We Are Each Other's Keepers
Pushing Through
by Rainer Maria Rilke
It's possible I am pushing through solid rock
in flintlike layers, as the ore lies, alone;
I am such a long way in I see no way through,
and no space; everything is close to my face,
and everything close to my face is stone.
I don't have much knowledge yet in grief
so this massive darkness makes me small.
You be the master, make yourself fierce, break in:
then your great transformation will happen to me,
and my great grief cry will happen to you.
translated by Robert BlySome days I wonder if all the praying we do works; Morning and Evening prayers, and the Sunday rituals. It seems as if we are caught in a perpetual whirlwind of darkness and evil. Some days I feel powerless to do anything short of my small acts of kindness and intentional self-awareness. The kind of awareness where I diligently keep track of my thoughts and behaviors that can (sometimes carelessly) reverberate through the atmosphere. I know that human beings are evolving and that transformation is occurring at so many levels beyond the scope of intellectual understanding.
Yet, when I see another person standing on a street corner with a sign, “Need work and food”, my heart breaks. And the woman, sheltering under the trees behind a gas station and fast-food restaurant—who has been there for months— I want to do something. I wonder if my contribution will have any effect; the bag I hold out to her with a wool shawl, some essentials, a sandwich, and a Prayer card. I asked, “What do you need?” She replied, “Cash.”
I wondered how far my bag of compassion would carry her? And then I read in Letters of the Scattered Brotherhood:
The reality of you is in the invisible, the intangible. In retrospect your spiritual milestones stand stronger to you in their fixed position than any outward experience. Having arrived at this understanding try now, quietly, gently, without too much effort of self-discipline to keep in the invisible, train yourself to keep immaterial. Watching and praying are essential. When hard pressed by old habits and you are under the heavy blanketings of times and events, you, as it were, disappear. This is the moment to step back into the invisible, for then the invisible will enfold you and give you great power in the visible world.
There it was—my answer and words of encouragement. No matter how badly I want to know the result of my actions, in most situations, I won’t. But, I felt an instantaneous power after reading the above. We are forever connected to the great Soul and other souls because there is no other way to be. Seeing the faces of suffering and looking deeper to see beauty in all that surrounds us is a contradiction. In those instances, we are face-to-face with divinity. This is how Intelligence is set up and struggling against the great Plan is futile, as it seems we do have a desire to do more and be more, instead of accepting what we can do at the moment. And this just might be where we fall out of alignment with divine Goodness.
Put all sadness from thee, for it is the sister of doubt and anger. It is the most mischievous of all spirits and the worst to the servants of God. Learn now, O unwise man! how it troubleth the Holy Spirit; remove therefore, sadness from thyself and affect not the Holy Spirit which dwelleth within thee.
The Shepherd of Hermas, (A.D. 142-157) has a valid point, relevant today. Staying tuned into the light in the midst of the chaos we are experiencing on many levels—locally and globally—really does take an act of will. This constant vigil—with our hearts and minds—to rise above what appears to be mundane tasks are the kinds of actions that change the world without us knowing the end results.
In Franciscan spirituality we engage in simple life-changing endeavors with joy, accepting the grace that accompanies our work in this world. In one of St. Bonaventure’s (1217-1274) Soliloquies is written:
[God] is the One who is closer to you than you are to yourself.
And with that understanding we recognize how intimately connected we are to everyone else. The theme that keeps re-occurring in my studies and explorations these days is that we are hard-wired to care for ourselves and those within and beyond our relational circles.
So when you have one of those days when you think that you reached your wits end and your tiny world is crumbling, or you have managed to create enough tension and turmoil in a relationship to incite an explosion, or an old wound triggers a reaction; remember how close your divine source is to you. It is indeed a humbling realization.
At those moments I’ve discovered that a reverent bow and quiet expression of gratitude makes things feel different. If I haven’t been able to step back and breathe in the middle of my actions then as soon as possible I bring myself back into my body and find my center. This is a prayer I’ve memorized and recite often throughout the day. It creates spontaneous results.
I stand in Light. No foolish thoughts, no foreboding, no false imagery, no terror can come near this Light within me, for I love it and serve it and I stand here purified, dedicated to honor, to health of mind and body, to peace of mind and life everlasting.
Yes, another practice to try on (if you wish) for 14, 21 or 40 days as a way to bring beauty—at the very least—and a clearer vision to circumstances. And a piece of music to lift you and hold you in sacred space in the days to come.
Dvorak/ String Quintet No. 12 in F major, Op. 96 “American”